


The Threads That Don't Tie Us

by x_thelittleprince_x



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Awkward Mark Lee (NCT), Confused Mark Lee (NCT), Feelings, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Internal Conflict, Johnny is confident, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan & Mark Lee Are Best Friends, Light Angst, M/M, Mark Lee (NCT) is Whipped, Mark is not, Sad Mark Lee (NCT), Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Suh Youngho | Johnny is Whipped, Sweet Suh Youngho | Johnny, Tattoos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:28:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24285865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/x_thelittleprince_x/pseuds/x_thelittleprince_x
Summary: When Mark was a kid, it never seemed like a big deal to him. Kids would tease him and say that he was a defect. That he’d never get his happily ever after like in the stories their parents read them. But Mark brushed them off. What did it matter that he didn't have a soulmate tattoo? Did that really define who he was and how the rest of his life went?-Otherwise known as Mark being ashamed of not having a soulmate tattoo but Johnny who also doesn't have one is confident and shows Mark that a lack of a tattoo doesn't define who he is or how much happiness he deserves.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Mark Lee/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 6
Kudos: 139





	The Threads That Don't Tie Us

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> To be honest, this story is kind of a mess haha, Mark is all types of confused but I hope you enjoy reading it!  
> (For reference Johnny started college a bit late so that's why they're in the same year even though they're not the same age)

When Mark was a kid, it never seemed like a big deal to him. Kids would tease him and say that he was a defect. That he’d never get his happily ever after like in the stories their parents read them. But Mark brushed them off. What did it matter that he didn't have a soulmate tattoo? Did that really define who he was and how the rest of his life went? Apparently, to others, it did. And as he got older and went through middle school and high school, he became more self-conscious of his nonexistent mark. He was tired of the looks of pity that always got sent his way. Tired of how people treated him like glass like he’d break if they mentioned their own soulmates around him.

So when college came and his parents decided to move them back to South Korea, he hid his arms beneath long-sleeved shirts or hoodies and when people asked him about his tattoo, he’d simply say he liked keeping it private. Even so, it hurt him. Was he never meant to find someone? Was he not allowed happiness or the chance to get married and have a good life? What was so wrong about him? 

-

“It’s our last year, finally.” Donghyuck cheered. Mark walked beside him, feeling the brisk fall air raise goosebumps on his covered arms. 

“Thank god,” Mark said, crossing his arms close to himself to contain some sort of heat. He was glad their first class of the semester wasn’t too far from the dorms. 

“We’ve gotta hit more parties this semester. I gotta enjoy every moment before I get tied down.” Donghyuck joked. For Donghyuck, he was a bit more free-spirited and wasn’t too fond of the idea of being connected to someone. He knew about Mark’s situation and was the only person that was trusted enough to keep it. They’d met during their freshman year as roommates so it was bound to be seen at some point but the fact that they became such close friends helped when deciding to tell him his secret. Mark was grateful that Donghyuck didn’t treat him differently because it though. 

“Your soulmate is in for a ride.” Mark teased, rolling his eyes as they approached the science building. At least he wouldn't be alone, they’d managed to get into the same general biology class that was needed for graduation. 

Finding their class with ease, they found a lab table towards the back of the room and settled in. 

“I wish this class wasn’t so early,” Donghyuck complained, resting his head in his hand propped up on the tabletop. 

“It’s not so bad. At least our professor was rated good.” Professor Moon was apparently quite understanding and had a passion for science so he tried his best to be sure his students succeeded. A few more students piled in, looking tired and seemed like they regretted their choices in picking an eight am. Mark was surprisingly fine with having morning classes. He preferred to get his classes done in the morning so he had the rest of the day to himself. 

“Welcome to general biology. Let's have a nice semester together.” The Professor said, walking into the room and settling down at his desk. He gave the class an easy-going smile and spouted out some basic information about himself before asking them to introduce themselves, one by one. Mark felt his heart lurch at the idea of speaking out to a room full of strangers. The class was full of different majors, ranging all the way from finance to psychology. And before he knew it, everyone had gone and it was Donghyuk’s turn to speak.

“I’m Donghyuck. Senior. My major is Business. I love singing and I hate science.” The class let out a small chuckle at the last part. Donghyuck smirked, sitting back down in his seat. Their professor rolled his eyes playfully, leaning back in his chair. 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He said lightly, then gestured to Mark it was his turn. Shit, he was next. Mark felt his throat tighten while he stood. Awkwardly, he fiddled with his sleeve shirt while speaking. 

“I’m Mark. Senior. My major is English. I’m originally from Canada and I also hate science.”

“Oh, so we have two English speakers! You and...Johnny right?” Their professor exclaimed, making Mark glance around the room in confusion. If he was honest, he had barely paid attention to anyone's introduction. 

“ _ What part of Canada? _ ” A deep voice asked, this time in English. Mark turned to his left to see probably the most handsome man he’d ever seen. His soft chocolatey brown hair was falling into his eyes that were probably the most mesmerizing pair he’d ever seen. Lips almost pouty but plump and a sharp jawline. To be honest, Mark froze. Hot guys and Mark never mixed well. It wasn’t until Donghyuck kicked his ankle that he realized he hadn't responded. He hissed in pain but smiled through it. 

“ _ Uh, Vancouver. _ ” He responded finally. The guy, Johnny grinned softly and Mark swears his heart skipped a beat. Was he okay? 

“ _ Cool, I'm from Chicago originally. _ ” Even his voice was smooth like honey. 

“ _ Cool, _ ” Mark said a little dazed. Donghyuck, getting tired of seeing Mark embarrass himself, pulled him back down into his seat. 

“Okay, now that we’ve got that out the way. Let's get into the syllabus.” The professor said, drawing the class's attention towards him. So maybe the class wasn’t that bad. At least now that he knew that Johnny was a part of it. Sneaking small glances every now and then, Mark couldn’t help but admire how the sun filtered in through the window as it got brighter outside and hit his frame. 

“Does someone have a crush already?” Donghyuck teased quietly, leaning into him. Mark felt his face heat up, quickly trying to deny the statement. 

“N-no.” He could tell Donghyuck didn’t believe him instead sighing and glancing over at Johnny. 

“I mean he is cute…” Donghyuck said. Mark huffed and tried to focus back on their professor. 

“-Lab partners.” Mark realized he missed the first part of their professor's words, getting confused when he heard names being called. “Johnny and….Mark.” Mark’s eyes widened 

“Congrats Mark. You just landed yourself the cute guy for the rest of the semester.” Donghyuck said, giggling when Mark immediately had an internal breakdown. 

“What? The rest of the semester?” He took it back. This class sucked. “I’m glad you find my pain amusing.” Mark deadpanned when Donghyuck wouldn’t stop laughing. 

“Have fun.” He sang, gathering his stuff and heading to his partner's table. Mark couldn’t believe he was being separated from his best friend and thrown with the cutest guy in the class. He was barely gonna survive this semester. He was gonna stutter and say something stupid than have to move back to Canada and never come back out of embarrassment. Great. 

“Hey.” Johnny greeted, coming to replace Donghyuck’s spot. “I guess our professor decided to stick us, foreigners, together huh.” Mark let out a high pitched laugh that he internally cringed at.

“Um..uh yeah. I guess so.” Johnny grinned endearingly, pulling up the sleeves of his hoodie. Mark’s eyes instinctually fell to see if there was a tattoo. Of course, there had to be a tattoo. Everyone but Mark had one. However, when he looked at the other's left wrist where the tattoo should have been, there was nothing. Mark gasped softly, bringing Johnny’s attention to him. 

“Something wrong?” His eyes searching Mark’s face. God, his eyes were pretty.

“Where’s your tattoo?” Damn it. He hadn’t meant to blurt that out but he was so curious. He’d never seen someone else without one. Johnny raised his eyebrows, surprised.

“I don't have one.” He stated simply. Just didn’t- Mark couldn't believe what he was hearing. He wasn't the only one out there who didn't have a set soulmate for himself. 

“You...don’t...have one?” Mark asked, shock evident in his voice. Johnny's face looked perplexed as he nodded. 

“Yeah. Why? Is that a problem?” 

“No!” Mark said immediately and maybe a bit too loud because a few students turned to look at them. “Sorry. I didn’t mean it in a bad way. I’ve just never met anyone who didn’t have one.” Johnny seemed to understand and gave a small smile.    
“It is what it is. Doesn’t bother me though.” He murmured. 

“Oh.” Mark couldn't seemingly formulate words albeit shocked still. How did Johnny seem so indifferent to the idea of not having a soulmate? Mark had felt ashamed his whole life that he didn’t have one and still struggled with it even to this day.

The professor gave them a quick lab exercise to work on together, which thankfully Johnny understood quite well because there were a few concepts he was a bit shaky on. When class finally ended, Mark let out a sigh of relief. That had been the longest class period ever. 

“Hey, you wanna exchange numbers? I mean we might need it in the future since we’re lab partners.” Johnny asked casually. 

“Oh yeah, of course.” Mark handed over his phone, watching Johnny type in some numbers and send a message to his phone before handing it back to Mark. They both stood, packing up their stuff and that's when Mark realized just how tall Johnny was. Great, not only was he handsome and sweet, but he was also tall. God did have his favorites. 

This was gonna be a long semester.

-

“Donghyuck, I swear to god. I will kick you.” Mark warned as the other cackled, a few students in the dining hall near them giving them annoyed looks. 

“Guys, it was so funny! He was so caught up looking at him that he knocked over all the microscope slides. You should have seen his face afterward.” Donghyuck had not stopped teasing him since that first day of class. Now, a few weeks later, he was retelling an unfortunate story of when Mark had made a fool of himself in front of Johnny. But what else was new? Ever since that first meeting, he had tried his best to not look like a fool in front of him but it seemed like the opposite always happened. 

“Maybe you should ask him out?” Renjun said, leaning into Jeno who was busy eating. As if it was that easy. He was surprised Renjun was encouraging him to try and date someone who wasn’t his soulmate though it wasn't uncommon to date before settling down. 

“I literally clam up and say or do stupid shit every time he talks to me. I feel so bad he has to work with me.” Mark groaned, covering his face with his hands. He wished life would take pity on him and just have him cease to exist. Jaemin reached forward, pulling Marks's hands from his face gently.    
“You know what you need to do?” He asked. This couldn't be good if it was coming from Jaemin. “ _ Bring out your inner sexy. _ ” The English he used made the idea sound even worse.    
“Oh my god,” Mark said, embarrassed. “That’s it. I’m leaving.” He started to get up when Donghyuck latched onto his arm, making him sit again.

“He’s right! There’s a party this weekend. Let's go, we can invite him.” He needed new friends. Asap. 

“Hyuck. I don't think he’s gonna wanna go. He doesn’t seem like the type.” 

“Who says he doesn't like to have fun? You're inviting him, sorry not sorry.” Donghyuck replied. Mark knew there was no way of getting out of it. Hyuck usually got what he wanted. 

“Fine.” Everyone cheered. “I hate you all.” 

“You love us, Mark. Isn't that right Jeno.” Jaemin said, reaching over Renjun to pinch Jeno’s cheek stuffed full of food. Jeno nodded quickly, swallowing, while Renjun batted Jaemins hands away from in front of him which only fueled Jaemin to try attacking Renjun with kisses and cooing. 

“Y'all three are weird,” Mark stated, disgusted by their blatant PDA. 

“Not weird, just soulmates.” Jeno pointed out. Right, soulmates. That brought Mark's mood down almost instantly. 

“You're just jealous. Don’t worry you’ll find your own one day.” Jaemin said, giving up trying to kiss Renjun and settling for cuddling up to his side. The problem was, Mark was jealous. It hurt to admit it to himself because he tried to not let it affect him but there were times like these that made him realize he wouldn’t mind having that person that makes him whole. That gives him affection and loves him. In fact, he craved it. 

Donghyuck noticed Mark's sudden silence and quickly placed a comforting hand over his, giving a squeeze. That was one of the things Mark loved best about Donghyuck. The fact that he was able to read the room where others couldn't, though he couldn’t blame Jaemin for his comment since Mark never revealed his secret. However, he was grateful for the small comfort his friend had given him. Mark gave him a grateful smile. 

-

Mark was tipsy. Not a stumbling and slurring type of tipsy but anyone could see how flushed his face was and how his normal giggling was amplified. The worst part was that he’d only started drinking to drown his sorrows when Johnny hadn’t shown up to the party, even though he promised to try and make it if he finished his essay. Though it was a slim chance of him coming, he still felt hopeful and then stupid for even trying. He’d worn his best jeans that made his legs and butt look great and even went as far as to let Jaemin throw him into a tightly ripped long-sleeved shirt that rode up his stomach every time he moved, exposing way too much skin for his comfort. 

“Okay, I’m cutting you off,” Donghyuck said, grabbing the red solo cup out of his hands. Mark whined, making grabby hands. 

“No!” 

“You need to go back to the dorm. You’re drunk.” Mark huffed at his friends' words. He knew they were true but that didn’t mean he wanted to follow them. Plus, the idea of being alone made him feel upset.

“Am not.” He hiccuped lightly before catching sight of a friend on the dance floor. “Oh, Lucas!” He started to run up the tall boy who was dancing when two long arms wrapped around his middle, pulling him back into a strong chest. Mark panicked for a moment, trying to twist around out of the tight grip until he heard a familiar voice talking in his ear. 

“I think Donghyuck’s right. You should go home and get some rest.” 

“Johnny!” Mark said excitedly, turning around in his grip. 

“I called him to come and pick up your sad ass.” Donghyuck mentions. “You’re welcome.” He adds before walking off, taking a long sip from his (Mark’s) drink. When did he grab Mark’s phone and text Johnny? Then again, he  _ was _ too busy drinking and having a dance-off with Jaemin at one point to notice much else around him. 

“Come on, let's get you home.” Mark was practically dragged from the party and suddenly became aware of just how cold it was with his attire. It was almost enough to sober him up. Almost but not quite. He realized as they walked towards a silver car parked on the side of the road, that Johnny still had a firm grip around his waist and if Mark was actually sober he would have been a flustered mess. Mark kind of liked being able to lean into Johnny’s side without fear of rejection. He liked the feeling of protection he felt whenever Johnny was around him. He just really liked Johnny, but a little voice in the back of his head told him that it didn’t matter what he felt because he and Johnny weren’t soulmates. Both of their wrists lay void of any ink. 

“I don’t wanna go home,” Mark complained, being placed gently against the car while Johnny found his keys in his pocket. “I’m cold.” Johnny paused while opening the passenger side door, taking in the clothing Mark wore before making a tsk sound, shaking his head but Mark could see his gaze stuck on the patch of skin at his midriff that was peeking out.

“Maybe if you had worn proper clothing-” 

“I wanted to impress you.” Mark blurted before his eyes widened. Did he just say that out loud? Okay, could the world just swallow him whole at this point? 

“You wanted to impress me?” Johnny was suddenly quiet, his hand on top of the door tightening a bit. Mark rested his head against the car, feeling a bit dizzy. 

“Woah, the world's spinning.” He giggled. Within a second, Johnny lurched forward to hold onto him again so he wouldn't fall, letting out a sigh.    
“Right..you're drunk..” Was that disappointment in his voice? Man, Mark really was drunk, of course, he wasn't disappointed. “Here. Take my jacket.” Johnny slipped out of his bomber jacket, pulling it around Mark's smaller shoulders. 

“I’m floating in it,” Mark stated, laughing and flapping his arms slightly to show how much space was left. 

“That’s because you’re small,” Johnny said with a fond smile, proceeding to help him into the car. Mark protested to his comment but got comfortable in the leather seat. Closing the door, Johnny jogged around to the driver’s side and got in. 

“Where am I dropping you off to?” Mark pursed his lips, thinking. He really didn’t want to go home. “Mark?” He was quiet for a moment before responding.

“I don’t wanna be alone.” God, he sounded so pathetic. Johnny would surely never want to deal with him ever again after this, he’d probably interrupted the essay he was supposed to be writing too. Instead, he had to pick up Mark’s drunk ass. He could feel Johnny's eyes burning into the side of his head but he refused to meet his stare. 

“Alright, how about I bring you back to my apartment? Sound good?” 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. You can just take me back to my dorm room.” Mark rushed to say, suddenly feeling a lot more upset than before. 

“Hey, it’s okay. We’re friends, right? Let me be a good friend and keep you company.” Johnny said, starting the car. Friends? He didn’t realize Johnny thought of them that way. They didn’t text that much outside of classes besides school-related stuff or meet up so it surprised him. A bit reluctantly, Mark nodded. 

Johnny was way too nice to him. The way he took him to his apartment and let him rest on his bed, taking the couch even when Mark tried to protest against it. He even gave him some water and Advil for the morning so he wouldn’t have to be in pain. Mark genuinely didn’t understand why he was so nice when all Mark had done was ruin his night or so he felt he had. They talked for a bit before Mark fell asleep, Johnny sitting at the side of the bed, listening to him ramble about his friends and school, and he listened to every word without complaint. When Mark finally had tired himself out, his eyes drifted closed failing to see the pure adoration from Johnny as he watched him for a few minutes before whispering a good night and leaving the room. 

-

Stretching his limbs, he yawned. Wow, his bed felt bigger than usual he thought, feeling a dull thudding in his head as he sat up, looking around. Wait...this wasn’t his room. A jolt of panic ran down his spine as he took in the cream-colored walls covered in pictures he didn't recognize. Then it hit him. 

“Johnny.” He muttered. Everything from the night before came rushing back to him and the flood of embarrassment almost became too much for him. Oh my god, I can never face him again, he thought. Remembering the pain meds, he took them from the nightstand and swallowed them quickly so he could hopefully feel a bit better soon. He got up carefully so he wouldn’t lose his balance and exited the room, feeling on edge. It was early in the morning so if he left now maybe he could get out before Johnny noticed. 

“Good Morning.” A voice called out to him as he tiptoed towards the front door. Mark immediately froze, his back becoming rigid and face turning red. 

“Uh, morning..” He trailed, feeling awkward. The kitchen was right across from the living room so it wasn’t hard to miss Johnny’s large body sitting at the small dining table scrolling through his phone. 

“Trying to leave me already?” Johnny joked, setting his phone down. Mark let out a nervous laugh.

“No, I mean yeah but no..” Face palming, he sighed. “I’m sorry, I just feel bad about last night. I figured you might want me to leave.” Johnny raised an eyebrow. 

“Why would I want you to leave?” His question caught Mark off guard. In a way he liked that about Johnny, he never seemed to know what he was going to say but it also ended with Mark flustered most of the time.

“Well. I interrupted your night, didn't I?” Mark fiddled with the hem of his shirt, unsure what to do in this situation. Johnny smiled, gesturing to the seat across from him. It was then that he noticed there was a plate of food waiting for him. Now, he really felt bad he was trying to leave, Johnny had gone out of his way to make him breakfast when he really didn't have to.

“Actually I had just finished my essay when your friend texted me. I didn’t mind getting you, besides it gets lonely here. It was nice to have some company.” Mark sat in the seat across from Johnny. “I probably should have texted you I wasn’t gonna be able to make it to the party but I got so into my writing that I didn’t realize how much time had passed until it was too late. So I’m very sorry about that.” Johnny apologized, making Mark wave him off. 

“It's fine, haha. Not a big deal.” Johnny, however, just frowned, leaning forward with his arms crossed. 

“No, I made a promise. I should have at least texted you.” It was quiet for a moment. “Let me take you out some time to make up for it. We can hang out and just talk.” Mark’s heart accelerated at the thought of hanging out one on one with him. Like a date, his thoughts provided him unhelpfully. 

“O-oh uh sure. Cool.” He said, giving a shy smile. Mark couldn't remember a time in his life when he’d felt a crush this intensely. When he was growing up, he had a few infatuations but usually, he gave up on all of them knowing it was useless because they had a soulmate out there but this time Johnny didn’t have one and that scared and enticed him most of all. The fact that Johnny had the free will to reject him and it would be because he actually didn’t like Mark that way, was terrifying because he’d never experienced that, but there was still that sliver of hope that lingered nevertheless. That Johnny would return his feelings. On the other hand, Mark was reluctant to hold onto that hope, because in the end, they weren’t soulmates and therefore not meant to be. Wouldn’t that mean they wouldn’t last? They didn’t have any sort of bond to tying them together. 

-

Ever since that day, things had changed between them. They’d become closer. Mark didn’t understand it but it was like Johnny just gravitated towards him. He would hang out with him and his friends, of course giving them even more reason to tease him. They actually texted outside of class now, pretty much every day. Johnny always sent him cute good morning and good night texts that made his heart flutter. 

Mark tried his best to hide his feelings and bury them because he didn’t want to get hurt but it was so hard when Johnny made it his personal mission to be in his life. Not to mention he was literally the sweetest person ever which didn't help him with his crush whatsoever. Then there was the fact that he kept taking them on what felt like dates, going to the cafe or the arcade or even just ordering takeout and watching movies at Johnny’s place but he knew they weren't so he tried to not let himself get too immersed in them. 

One thing he really enjoyed, however, was getting to know Johnny. Hearing about his life back in Chicago and his aspirations for the future. They often used a mix of English and Korean when talking to each other, making Mark feel the most at home he’d felt in a while. 

Yet Mark couldn't help but feel guilty because he still hadn’t shown Johnny his bare wrist. At first, it was because it never came up in their conversations but eventually it did and all Mark could do was stutter and change the topic. He didn’t know why he was so scared to show him. Maybe it was because he was ashamed that the world had condemned him to be alone forever or maybe because he was afraid Johnny would think less of him. Think of him as a defect like others had. He knew Johnny was confident about his own lack of a tattoo which was something he could never understand but he himself was ashamed and in a way he projected that image onto Johnny. Yet, he never thought less of Johnny for it. In a way, he did feel bad that such a wonderful person was not given a soulmate but he didn’t look at him differently, just himself. 

In all honesty, he should have seen it coming that Johnny would get eventually tired of Mark avoiding the soulmate situation. It all started when the semester was just at the end and winter break was coming up. Mark’s friends had invited him and Johnny to a holiday get together. Things had been going well, just sharing stories and laughing until Jaemin had suggested they play truth or dare to pass the time and everyone seemed to think it was a great idea, everyone except for Mark. He knew things could quickly spiral out of hand if someone asked a personal question or dared something stupid. Like luck would have it, Renjun asked him to do the worst thing ever when he picked dare on his turn when everyone complained he kept picking truth. 

“Show us your tattoo.” Mark’s breath hitched, his eyes darting between everyone in the circle who was looking at him expectantly.

“Renjun, stop,” Donghyuck said, suddenly realizing how bad this could get. 

“What? We’ve never seen it. He’s seen all of ours, it's only fair.” Renjun stated. 

“Uh, I-I can’t. I’ll take the penalty.” Mark stuttered, not meeting anyone’s eyes. The silence became unforgettable before Johnny’s voice from next to him spoke. 

“Why can’t you show us?” Mark hadn’t expected him to press. He never had before but this time he could hear the bitter tone leaking through his words. 

“I just...can’t. I’m sorry.” Johnny huffed, before standing up. 

“You know what, I think I’m gonna leave early.” Mark felt himself tear up, knowing Johnny was angry at him. Donghyuck gave him a long look that mixed between wanting to comfort his friend and smack him for being stupid. 

“Uh..okay then let's move on,” Renjun said, scratching his head awkwardly. Everyone looked confused at what had just happened. 

“Go after him.” Donghyuck pressed Mark, pointing at the door where Johnny had stormed out. He nodded, quickly standing up and running out the apartment. It wasn’t until he was outside the building that he saw Johnny speeding toward his car parked on the side of the road a bit down the street.    
“Johnny!” He called, pushing his legs to go faster. He didn’t want to know what would happen if Johnny got in the car and left. He couldn’t lose him. Gaining momentum from the sudden adrenaline rush, he managed to grab a hold of the back of Johnny’s jacket just as he reached the hood of his car. “Please, stop!” 

“Why? Why should I?” As he spun around to face Mark, his voice harsh. Mark’s hand fell back to his side, tears welling up in the corners of his eyes as he stepped back.

“I’m sorry. Please just don’t leave..don’t leave me.” His voice coming out broken, as the tears fell. He watched as Johnny’s jaw tightened, his eyes looking away from Mark. 

“That’s not fair. You can’t do that to me.” He said, hand turning white around the keys gripped in them. 

“I’m sorry,” Mark repeated. 

“God damn it, Mark! Do you not realize how much I care about you? Why won’t you show me your wrist?” 

“Because.” Mark couldn't think anymore. All he knew is that he didn't want Johnny to leave him but he was frozen. He didn't know what to say. 

“Because you don't have one?” Johnny asked, staring straight into Mark’s eyes this time. Mark’s jaw dropped slightly before trying to scramble to find words but Johnny didn’t let him speak. “Yeah, I know that you don’t have one. Back during that night of the party, you didn’t realize your sleeves had ridden up. I wanted you to trust me with it and show me when you were ready but clearly that was never gonna happen, was it?” Johnny’s words were sharp, piercing Mark’s heart with the accusation. He could feel his throat constrict at how hurt he felt, his tears stinging his eyes. Johnny knew this entire time? Why hadn’t he just told him he saw? He thought back to how he had treated Mark over the last few months, being nothing but the absolute sweetest. Suddenly he felt so stupid, thinking Johnny would think of him differently. 

“I was. I swear I was but I was so scared and ashamed. I’m so used to people thinking of me differently..” 

“Is it really so bad? Others thinking about you differently? Who cares what they think. Are you ashamed of me too?” Johnny asked, searching Mark’s face as his tears slowed and dried on his cheeks. Mark could see the pain in his eyes and he felt his heart ache. He never wanted to see that look on his face ever. 

“No, never. I could never ever be ashamed of you. I was just so tired of people telling me that I wouldn't get my happy ending or calling me defected because I didn't have a soulmate.” Mark confessed, looking down at the pavement below him in shame. 

“But aren't you feeding into it? You’re the only one hurting your chances at happiness, not anyone else.” It was quiet between them as Mark thought over his words. He knew he was right. The more he thought it over, the more he realized that he was only holding himself back. That he shouldn't care what people thought about him. Maybe that’s how Johnny was able to go around, his wrists bare for the world to see. 

“You’re right.” He had been seeing things wrong the whole time.

“Life is about taking chances, Mark. Not everyone is gonna understand or be nice but you’ll never know till you try. And if people don't like it then the hell with them. Chase your own happiness.” The tone in Johnny’s voice had become softer like he was trying to speak to Mark’s soul. Mark looked up a newfound determination in his eyes. Stepping into Johnny’s space, he could see the weariness on the other's face.

“What are you doing?” 

“Chasing my happiness.” Then he leaned up and wrapped his arms around Johnny’s neck, pressing his lips against his. Johnny didn't move for a moment, seemingly shocked before he melted, pulling Mark closer against him. Their lips moving against one another softly. Mark didn’t believe in perfection but at this moment in time he truly believed that this was the most perfect moment he’d ever had. Letting his worries go, he understood something for the first time. Even if he didn't have a tattoo to define it, Johnny was his soulmate and he didn’t need anyone or anything to prove that for him. It was scary to embrace the unknown but he didn't need to worry about that because he knew that Johnny wanted him just as much as Mark wanted him and not just because he had a tattoo showing they were meant to be And for once, Mark was glad that the surface of his wrists didn’t hold any ink. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, please leave a kudos~ I had a lot of fun writing their dynamic together, and who doesn't love Johnny haha he's so sweet to Mark. Mark is adorably awkward but we love him for it.


End file.
